Mikala Lugen, a 2019 graduate of 两性色午夜 University, is always on the move. Visiting music and vacation venues across the country and the world, she is always on the hunt for the next great adventure.
What might be surprising is that Lugen is typically traveling alone 鈥 and she likes it that way.
Lugen first shared this insight on her blog, , on UPROXX offering guidance to other young women on why they too should consider literally flying solo.
(The following is reprinted with permission from Mikala Lugen.)
鈥淚t is in all of us to defy expectations, to go into the world and to be brave, and to want, to need, to hunger for adventures. To embrace the chance and risk so that we may breathe and know what it is to be free.鈥 ~Mae Chevrette
鈥'What a beautiful sunset鈥 I鈥檓 grateful for you and love you,'鈥 I whispered.
鈥淚 was speaking to the sun, the world鈥 myself鈥 all of it. That sentence was followed by the biggest exhale my 25-year-old self could muster up. I鈥檇 just finished walking two miles on the beach in then finished by watching the sunset. All solo. As the sun dipped below the horizon, I settled into a moment of gratitude for getting myself here 鈥 both metaphorically and literally 鈥 alone and confident on a beach in paradise.
鈥淭his blissed-out moment came several days into my . I was, as you might have surmised, in heaven. Not only was I basking every day in the salty sea and tropic sun, but I was getting to know myself on a deeper level 鈥 mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically, thanks to a 30-day online yoga course.
鈥淚 was also taking myself on daily sunrise and sunset strolls and enjoying my internal commentary more than I ever have. I found out she/me is quite funny actually and full of great ideas like sleeping with the windows open instead of the fake-ass AC, refusing the temptation of 鈥減lans,鈥 and walking around my condo naked swigging coconut water straight from the jug like a proper bachelorette.
鈥淵ou see, when you鈥檙e able to connect back with yourself and your internal voice and intuition, you naturally focus in on who you really are. You get to snatch power back and away from the firmly held grasp of the masculine-governed world. You are in full control of your environment and actions without the need to match a partner 鈥 whether it be a companion, lover, or group of friends 鈥 and their energies and moods. And no place is better for the bevy of fresh experiences that come with 鈥渂eing your own damned woman鈥 like being on the road.
鈥淚n my eyes, is one of the most empowering things a person can do. It subverts the outdated histories, myths, and stereotypes of our female ancestors 鈥 terrified to venture off on their own, in need of constant protection. Traveling alone reminds us that we can take care of ourselves (because admittedly, there are risks) and enjoy our own company. In the process, we unleash the power within ourselves and come to terms with just how strong we are when we take the step alone into the spotlight.
鈥淚n short, traveling alone as women allows us to become the main characters of our stories. Without men trying to wrest control from us.
鈥淎s I hinted before, traveling as a solo female comes with great responsibility and inherent risk. But there are ways to mitigate those risks with calculated and educated decision-making 鈥 . Of course鈥 most women already take active measures in their daily lives to be on alert: not walking alone at night, keeping their location services on for a couple of trusted friends and family members, being aware of their surroundings, locking their car and house doors at all times, etc. These same principles are applied when traveling alone, just in a different key.
鈥?
鈥淚 think it鈥檚 because of how it makes us feel 鈥 standing tall among the , and tackling all obstacles. It鈥檚 also a revelation. A realization that we don鈥檛 have to wait for people to join us to go to the five-star restaurant in our home cities, take the ultimate road trip, or jump out of a freaking airplane.
鈥淲e have ourselves. And that, ladies, is as powerful as it gets.
鈥淚t鈥檚 cliche to say, but almost all cliches have a kernel of truth hiding: at the end of the day, all you have is yourself. Do you want to be laying in bed at night, regretting all the times you said 鈥渘o鈥 to the adventures knocking on your door just because you don鈥檛 want to go it alone? I know I don鈥檛. That realization has never been as clear as it was on that beach in Jamaica.
鈥淚t鈥檚 a lesson I鈥檓 sure to carry forward the next time I hear the world calling my name. I hope it rings true for you, too.鈥
Lugen earned a Bachelor of Science in Public Relations with a marketing minor from 两性色午夜 in 2019.